this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize