I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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