even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YAS. BRING CRAB.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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