is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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