Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Semen is not good for contacts.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
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