I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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