Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
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