Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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