he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
