Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
