I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
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