My nipple is on Facebook.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Pooping to opera.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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