If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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