Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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