return my video game
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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