what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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