So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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