But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
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We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
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Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch