I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I don't get it.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life