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Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
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