She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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