why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Randomize
