My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Randomize
