I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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