Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
