so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
