Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (858): You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat. http://tfl.nu/yzbr
  Replies (19) Good night (12780) Bad night (1101)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess http://tfl.nu/ousq
  Replies (24) Good night (995) Bad night (2749)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (718): is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy? http://tfl.nu/hdnt
  Replies (54) Good night (2363) Bad night (1204)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (774): im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow http://tfl.nu/d8ac
  Replies (10) Good night (4451) Bad night (737)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it. http://tfl.nu/fcdd
  Replies (23) Good night (1064) Bad night (3369)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia. http://tfl.nu/uo67
  Replies (46) Good night (2466) Bad night (3515)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (316): toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials. http://tfl.nu/kc0s
  Replies (18) Good night (1245) Bad night (5034)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (907): Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen. http://tfl.nu/l4cq
  Replies (11) Good night (3531) Bad night (1096)
• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (352): he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled http://tfl.nu/6wmo
  Replies (2) Good night (1877) Bad night (820)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down. http://tfl.nu/6857
  Replies (5) Good night (2975) Bad night (1049)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan. http://tfl.nu/rfh9
  Replies (4) Good night (1955) Bad night (841)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome. http://tfl.nu/4od2
  Replies (5) Good night (855) Bad night (1749)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over. http://tfl.nu/3xvt
  Replies (2) Good night (658) Bad night (388)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs... http://tfl.nu/kz0n
  Replies (0) Good night (531) Bad night (837)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date. http://tfl.nu/28xu
  Replies (1) Good night (341) Bad night (501)

Randomize