i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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