Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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