i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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