how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
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