ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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