sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
