just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
