how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
