i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
