Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Randomize
