U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize