why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
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