that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Randomize
