He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
