Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
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