First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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