I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize