Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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