I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
