i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
