Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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