Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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