I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
