Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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