Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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