You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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