He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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